Water. Pure Evil.
“Mysterious?” You may ask, “How is water mysterious if we use it every day?” Because you, like millions of others are blinded to water’s mad rampage! Thousands of innocent people die yearly from this silent killer, not to mention the millions of dollars in property damage it has caused just within the past year in the southern United States.
The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) hasn’t classified it as a drug yet, but in my opinion they should. Once you’ve had a taste of it, or anything it’s in, (and most people do from an early age) you’ll want more. You’ll drink it every single day of your life. Chances are, most of you probably already do! But what sets it apart from most other drugs? If you stop drinking it, or something that contains it, you won’t live to tell the tale. When you quit, your first thought is: “I can do this!” But then the cravings set in, followed by severe withdrawals, ultimately ending with certain death.
Did you know it’s the main component in acid rain?
You may think all this information is plenty enough evidence to warn people of the evils of water, but skeptics and inquiring minds want to know more! Even with the facts I’m about to tell you, some people still don’t believe it’s bad! Some even go as far as saying it’s “healthy”!
Did you know water can cause severe burns, accelerate rusting and erosion, can cause electrical failures in all forms of electronics, and in its solid form cam causes severe tissue damage to humans?
This epidemic has spread worldwide and has still yet to be stopped! Water is home to platypi, one of the only venomous mammals on all of Earth! I for one think water abuse should be put to an end; it’s even in pesticides and poisonous cleaners! But it’s up to you to make your own decision.
Comments

Lilian

Lilian

2008-11-23 15:06:47

...Not only that but water is also found to be linked to the composition of 99.999% of tumors!

Alamir

Alamir

2008-11-23 15:31:31

Ah yes, water. The infamous DHMO, dihydrogen monoxide. I'm sure you've heard about how certain anti-DHMO people had brought their case right up to city councils in California and other places?
REPLIES: Wallaceofspades

Hogan

Hogan

2008-11-23 19:28:14

Must be a terrorist plot to sap and impurify all our precious bodily fluids.

Wallaceofspades

Wallaceofspades

2008-11-23 20:38:01

Replying to Alamir:
All the way to city councils? Wow, I didn't know that. I just heard someone talking about some water scam, and I found it interesting. The lengths some people will go for publicity. I hope the councilmen were not gullible enough to fall for it. Lol, that would be funny.

genius_advice

genius_advice

2008-11-23 23:13:30


Sorrel

Sorrel

2008-11-24 04:32:01

Cute article. I read a book called "Water" when I was a kid, and the most interesting thing that actually stuck was the patterns in water droplets that can be easily interpreted to determine how "healthy" the water is. I never understood why the bottle or tap debate was never settled with a simple drop test.
Maybe it was all bullshit, but either way your unique argument was refreshing :P
REPLIES: Wallaceofspades

Wallaceofspades

Wallaceofspades

2008-11-24 14:01:55


alishahnovin

alishahnovin

2008-11-24 14:29:58

I remember first hearing something like this back in high school. The teacher read it out to us always calling it 'dihydrogen monoxide' and never calling it water or H2O. When she finished, she asked if we should petition to ban it, and virtually everyone said yes. Then she told us that she was speaking about water, and some of us still said we should ban it.



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